Monday, April 17, 2017

A Come T'Cheeses Meetin'

Phil has the Devil in him. Demons have overtaken him. Haints too! When I told the vet about his behavior, he told me to get a squirt bottle (Holy Water). I now keep squirt bottles in every room . Phil thinks the squirt bottles are fun. He   considers it a game like Dodge Ball as I'm running, squirting, and cursing  him while he's leaping the rafters overhead,  out-maneuvering  me, leaving  me winded from the chase. Evil I tell you. Just plain evil!

I have never seen a cat retaliate for not getting its way. If I won't let him out to the porch as is his want, he runs to his scratching post, scratches it vigorously five or six times in rage and them attacks me from behind as I'm walking away. These actions  have been tolerated too long. At first, I considered it rough play, but it isn't. It has now escalated to sneak attack biting. I've had four puncture wounds in the past three weeks. Satin has come to my house.

The last time he tried to bite, I grabbed him by the scruff and whacked Lucifer right out of him with a rolled up newspaper . His attitude and demeanor changed dramatically. I think he now knows who reigns. For a while anyways. The Lord works in mysterious ways.... 

Phil has returned to normal, being sweet and cuddly. Although I do have to spread my legs for him  now and again. "Love means never having to say you're sorry."


  1. "Although I do have to spread my legs for him now and again." - at least you won't get pregnant! ;-b

    1. I'm glad you appreciate my humor. He is just a bossy cat!

    2. ain't THAT the truth! you should live with my 3 girls!